The Net-Net: First impressions matter. They allow us to scan our environment and assess our surroundings quickly, help us determine if the people we meet are friends, foes, fiends or even fiancés, and they can assist us in determining if, and to what extent, a company or community is worth investing in. First impressions have enormous impact on our long-term views, but they are only as good as the information we are being presented. If the information is feigned or ingenious, then our impressions will be dead wrong. Given that first impressions are being made nearly every second of every day by you and about you, knowing more about them will help make you more successful and make work, less work (and it might even lead to more happiness over time.)
A Simple Visual to Make the Point
Cool and Scary Data
Takes 1/10 of a second for someone to determine your level of trustworthiness.
The sweet spot of getting to know the “real person” is the 15-minute mark of a conversation.
It is estimated that 30% of interviewers make their decision on a candidate within the first 5 minutes of an interview.
55% of first impressions are based on visual cues, 38% are based on how someone hears your first words, and 7% is based on what you actually say.
Practical Tips
When meeting new people, use the 15 minute rule: Avoid making judgements about new team members until you have spent at least 15 minutes with them one-on-one. This will allow you to create a more accurate and full view of who they are and what they stand for.
If you make a bad impression, seek to surprise and delight, and do it fast: If you fear you made a bad impression on someone one, get back in there right away and have another conversation that focuses attention on some of your unique attributes or hobbies. Staying away from the person can actually strengthen the first impression and can hard set views about who you are.
Remove the “halos and horns” from first meetings: The “halo effect” and “horn effect” are biases that are dangerous in first impressions as they cause us to overestimate or underestimate the competence of individuals based on positive or negative first impressions. To avoid this, make first initial meet-and-greets longer and have a set of broad questions to ask so you can more holistically know the person.
Start (in the first meeting) as you intend to continue: The first impressions people make about you are only as good as the information you provide them. If you try to be someone other than who you are, they will use that information to create a profile of you. Then, as they get to know the “real” you, the dissonance between how you initially showed up and who you are day-to-day could could cause them to doubt your authenticity and keep their distance.
Inspiration Doses
The New Five Second Rule - Redefinition First Impressions. (TED, 2019)
A Matchmaker’s Advice On How to Make a Great Impression at Work. (HBR, 2021)
There May Be More to First Impressions Than You Realize. (Psychology Today, 2021)
Book Review In Haiku
Committing to Committing* -by André Martin Not dedicated. Now, browsing infinitely, It's time to commit.
*Inspired by Pete Davis’s Dedicated. In this wonderful book (that I have read probably 5 times in the last couple of years), Pete takes on the idea that commitment is a lost cause and makes some compelling points about why it has disappeared and how to bring it back into favor.
“GIF”-ffirmations
Let’s Connect!
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